No Thanks, Nurse Venus!

Transcribed By: Patamon_Princess

[At Cherry Hill Temple, Raye is curled up in bed and on the phone.]

RAYE: Hello? Hi, Lita. How are you feeling?
LITA: Not too bad. It sounds to me like you're still really sick, though.
RAYE: Yeah, I'll say. I'm burning up with a fever, and yet, I'm just freezing.
LITA: It sounds like we've all got the same thing 'cause Amy and Serena are also burning and freezing like you.
RAYE: Sad. Sailor Scouts lose a battle to a teeny flu bug.
LITA: Well, maybe not all of us. Mina's still healthy, up, and around.
RAYE: Mina?

[Raye's door bursts open and Mina pokes her head around the corner, shaking her basket wildly.]

MINA: Yoohoo! Good morning, Raye. Just thought I'd come and see how you were!
ARTEMIS: (in the basket) Ow! Ow!

[At Lita's house, Lita can hear the conversation on the other side.]

RAYE: Oh, Mina...
MINA: I heard you were sick, so here I am!

[Lita hangs up the phone.]

LITA: Huh. I guess it's Raye's turn to get 'The Treatment.'

[Lita looks around her room which is a big mess.]

LITA: Mina totally annihilated my room.

[Back at Cherry Hill Temple, Artemis is with Raye, when Mina carries in a bowl of soup. Artemis is sporting a large red bump on his head from his trip in the basket.]

MINA: Hi. Here's your soup. I hope it's hot enough this time.
RAYE: (to Artemis) This time? What does she mean?
ARTEMIS: She made soup for Amy and Lita. Amy's was like glue and Lita's was way too cold.
MINA: So, I made some mistakes, but I think trying counts. Anyway, this time it should be just right.

[Mina places the tray in front of Raye on the bed.]

MINA: Here.
RAYE: Oh, you shouldn't have.

[Raye looks at Mina, who is looking really sweet in anticipation.]

RAYE: (thinking) Hope I don't regret this.

[Raye takes a bit of the soup. A moment passes, then...]

RAYE: Yaaah!!

[Fire spews out of Raye's mouth. She sits on her bed breathing heavily, then collapses.]

MINA: Oh, Raye, are you okay? Oh no!

[Artemis tastes the soup and looks like he's going to cry.]

ARTEMIS: Mina, it's way too spicy!
MINA: Umm, maybe eat it with ice water? I just wanna help out. Come on, give me a chance.
ARTEMIS: Don't know if we can survive a chance.

[Raye stirs.]

RAYE: Oh, Mina, I'd like to get some rest now.
MINA: You need rest? Good idea. Just let me get this hot pot out of your way... [Mina accidentally spills the hot soup all over Raye. Artemis jumps to the floor and covers his head.]

ARTEMIS: She's a disaster!
MINA: Raye, let me make you more comfortable. I'll just straighten out your sheets...

[With a accidental tug, Mina knocks Raye onto the floor.]

ARTEMIS: Poor Raye. Try not to get too upset with the Klutzoid Queen. She mean well.
RAYE: She does, does she? Well, with friends like her, who needs Emerald?

[Mina finishes making the bed without any more accidents.]

MINA: Okay, Raye, your bed's all ready for you. Now you can have your rest.

[Raye gets into bed.]

MINA: Aha!

[Mina picks up an audiocassette she remembered.]

MINA: I brought this great Sounds of the Sea tape. It'll really help relax you.

[Mina stands in front of Raye's stereo trying to work it.]

MINA: Now, let's see. How does this thing-a-ma-bob work? Where's the switch? Ah... what does this do? Maybe it's this one, or... no, it's gotta be here. Hmm, uh, um... aha! Bingo!

[Mina turns a switch and a rock band comes out of the speakers with the volume turned up to the max.]

MINA: Hey, that doesn't sound like my sea tape!

[Mina fiddles with the buttons once more, managing to turn the music off, by blowing up the stereo.]

MINA: *laughs*

[Raye looks like she's about to attack Mina.]

MINA: Well, it's really funny! My sea tape is still okay, but you might need to get a new tape deck, Raye.
RAYE: (thinking) She's trying to kill me! I know she is! Now get out!

[Raye screams so loudly that Mina and Artemis take the hint and high-tail it out of there.]

[Mina walks through the city passing people wearing sick masks.]

MINA: So I made a small mess at Raye's house. I know I can be much more careful at Serena's house.
ARTEMIS: Ow! Mina, surely you're not planning to go there now!
MINA: Of course. Serena's whole family's down with the flu, so they really need some help. And since I'm not sick, I'm just the gal to do it, Artemis.

[Somewhere else in the city, Emerald stands in front of a large Dark Power Wedge.]

EMERALD: *laughs* Dark Power is building up well. Very soon now, the Dark Gate will be completely opened, and I'll be able to return to Diamond. I can't wait to show him my lovely handiwork, so it had better go as I have planned.

[At Serena's house, Serena's on the phone.]

SERENA: Huh? She trashed out your house too? Both Amy and Lita called me a few minutes ago with major Mina warnings, so I'll be prepared.
RAYE: Serena, you can't let her in. Just lock the doors and save yourself!
SERENA: But maybe she can help with Rini, 'cause she's still not sick.
RINI: Aaah!
SERENA: Rini just screamed, so I better go and check on her. I'll be careful. Bye.

[Out on the porch, Rini's hanging onto the outer edge where a sheet is fluttering.]

RINI: Mommy! Mommy!

[Serena's mother arrives and lifts Rini back up onto the balcony just as the sheet floats away. Serena arrives just then on the balcony.]

MRS. TSUKINO: Oh, Rini. Rini, I told you not to help me with the laundry. Go outside and play.
RINI: Huh? Oh, but I wanna help. You go ahead and rest. I'll do everything by myself, okay?
SERENA: Rini, as if you could really do the laundry. When did you become Miss Helpful?

[Rini climbs down]

RINI: But that's not nice to say. And talk about being useless!
SERENA: What? Me? Who almost broke every bone in her body? Not to mention losing a sheet?
MRS. TSUKINO: Serena, I have an unbelievable headache. Could you and Rini try to keep it down?

[Mrs. Tsukino heads back to bed.]

SERENA: Mama?
RINI: Hey, if I can't do your laundry, can I make your meals instead? Please, let me do something. I wanna help. I can do lots.
SERENA: Ooh. Isn't there anyone I can dump Rini off on until I'm better?
MINA: There's me!

[Looking down to the street, Serena and Rini see a figure cloaked in the bed sheet. The figure flings off the sheet to reveal no other than Nurse Mina.]

MINA: Venus to the rescue.
SERENA: Oh, hi Mina.

[Mina leaps up onto the porch.]

MINA: Not only can Nurse Venus leap tall balconies in a single bound, but she can also take care of Rini and nurse your entire family back to health.
SERENA: Oh. Well, from what I hear, you taking care of Rini would be a miracle enough for us.
MINA: Hup, two three, four. Come on, Serena, march yourself back to bed.
SERENA: But, I... *coughs*
MINA: What are you waiting for? I'll look after everything.
SERENA: But I'm okay, really. My mama's over the flu, so you don't have to worry.
MINA: No, you must be very careful, or you risk catching another cold, or even worse, you could catch pneumonia.
RINI: She's right.

[Mina leads Serena back into her bedroom.]

SERENA: Ooh...
MINA: Now, get back to bed.
SERENA: But...

[Outside, Artemis watches the girls.]

ARTEMIS: It wouldn't be the worse thing in the world if she happened to catch it herself. *sigh*

[Serena has fallen asleep and is dreaming.]

SERENA: Uh, Darien, please don't leave me now...

[Artemis approaches Luna whose lying on a pillow.]

ARTEMIS: Are you feeling all right, Luna?
LUNA: No, I'm feeling tired, sick, and gloomy. And envy you, Artemis.
ARTEMIS: Huh?
LUNA: You know what they say, a fool never catches a cold.
ARTEMIS: Luna...!

[The door opens and Mina and Rini stand in the entrance attired in nurse's uniforms.]

RINI: *laughs*
MINA: Here we are. We will nurse you back to perfect health, everyone.

[Serena wakes up.]

SERENA: Uh...
MINA: Hello, and how are we feeling today?
SERENA: Uh...
MINA: Great. (to Rini) Rini, hand me a thermometer, would you please?
RINI: Right.

[Rini throws her Luna Ball up into the air.]

RINI: Luna-P Magic!

[In a puff of smoke the ball turns into a first-aid kit.]

SERENA: Huh?

[Rini hands Mina the thermometer.]

RINI: Here, Nurse Mina.
MINA: Thanks, Nurse Rini.

[Mina sticks the thermometer into Serena's mouth.]

MINA: Time to take our temperature.

[Mina looks at her clock to measure the right amount of time.]

MINA: There. That should do it.

[Mina takes the thermometer and reads it. The screen blinks 37.5 degrees Celsius, then goes out.]

MINA: This is strange.

[Mina shakes the thermometer.]

MINA: Hey, Rini, do you know if this battery is okay here? Woah!

[The thermometer slips out of Mina's hand and crashes through the window letting cold air blow in.]

MINA: Waah! Uh, well, I made an eency, weency hole in your window. But don't worry. Your temperature, is not that absolutely necessary.
RINI: Uh, Mina...
LUNA: She bungles as much as Serena.
ARTEMIS: What these eyes have seen.

[Mina covers the hole with a sheet of paper and tape.]

MINA: There. I fixed the window, so there won't be any wind. Now, Serena, I'll bet you're hungry.
SERENA: Uh, no, no!
MINA: I'm gonna make you a nice treat. Maybe some hot soup or some coconut tea.
SERENA: Uh, uh, uh.
ARTEMIS: No, no, no.
SERENA: (thinking) If she makes something, I'm in trouble.
MINA: Are you sure, Serena?

[Mina pulls out a CD.]

MINA: Ah, I'll put on some nice music for you.
ARTEMIS: Nooo!!
MINA: Boy, Artemis, you're such a party pooper. Nobody's giving me credit around here.
RINI: I want to do something!
SERENA: Uh, no, I don't think so. Why don't you go see Mom now? Maybe she has something for you to do.
MINA: Let's go, Rini.
RINI: Okay!

[They both leave the room.]

SERENA: *signs*
MINA: Aaahh!!

[It sounds like Mina tripped over something.]

SERENA: Ah! Huh?

[Then the paper on the window tears off and cold wind blasts into the room.]

SERENA: And they I'm a big klutz.

[In the kitchen, Mina and Rini have changed and are now wearing long white aprons.]

MINA & RINI: Hmm.
MINA: Okay, Rini, you all set to go? Got your apron on?
RINI: Yeah!

[First, they try to tackle the dishes, but they keep dropping them on the floor.]

MINA & RINI: Aah! Oh, no!

[Then they try the laundry, but the pile keeps getting bigger instead of smaller.]

MINA: Help!
RINI: Wah! Too many bubbles!

[Rini gets swept away by the vacuum cleaner. Literally.]

RINI: Eeyow! Yow!

[Mina keeps knocking things off the furniture and slipping around.]

MINA: Ow! (to Rini) Don't put bleach in the laundry!

[Serena and her mother stand in the doorway into the family room where Mina in trying to wash the windows and Rini's trying to stop the vacuum cleaner.]

RINI: Stop this crazy thing!
MINA: Why don't these streaks go away?
RINI: It's slippery! Woah! Help!

[Mrs. Tsukino turns and heads back to her room.]

SERENA: Oh, what doofuses. Now I have to fix this.

[Serena starts towards them.]

SERENA: Oh, great, this is weird. I feel kind of dizzy and light-headed. Oh...

[Serena faints.]

MINA & RINI: Oh, no! Serena!
SERENA: Why am I feeling like I'm on spin-dry in Mom's washer?

[Serena's back in bed and dreaming. She and Darien are sitting at a table.]

SERENA: It's so nice to finally be alone with you on your birthday, Darien. It's like a dream come true.
DARIEN: Serena...
SERENA: Darien...

[An image of Raye floats by.]

RAYE: It is a dream, you space-brain!
SERENA & DARIEN: Huh?

[An image of Amy floats by as well.]

AMY: Why am I floating around in your dream?
RAYE: Stop this dream! You're acting like a silly love-sick pup!

[Lita's image follows.]

LITA: Stop dreaming! I have other places to be!
MINA & RINI: Wake up and smell the chicken soup!

[Darien suddenly starts falling.]

SERENA: Darien?
DARIEN: Serena!
SERENA: Darien! Oh!

[The table cloth catches fire and soon Serena is surrounded by a ring of fire.]

SERENA: *coughs* Hot!

[A splash of water hits her in the face and she sits up in her bed.]

SERENA: Now I'm cold. Huh?

[Mina is sitting by the bed holding a wet cloth. Rini is nearby, sleeping.]

SERENA: Oh, hi, Mina.
MINA: How do you feel? I was just changing the wet cloth on your forehead. I'm so sorry I woke you up, Serena.
SERENA: Have you managed to take care of Rini and me all this time by yourself, Mina?
MINA: Yeah, but it's no big deal. Rini helped out a bit.
SERENA: Hey, Mina, why are you being so helpful, even though you seem so bad at it?
MINA: Well, I know I'm bad at it, but I feel I should take care of my friends. Especially you, Princess Serena.
SERENA: So, you're taking care of me because I'm the Princess of the Moon?
MINA: No, I like who you are. You're a ditz sometimes, but you make everyone around you feel like they're special. You're one of a kind, though we don't know what kind, and I just can't ignore you when you need help.

[Rini stirs and wakes up.]

RINI: Is your fever gone now, Serena?
MINA: Yes it is. And thank you for all your help assisting me, Rini. You did a very good job.
SERENA: She did?
RINI: I liked helping. It was fun. Hey Mina, do you think it's time for us to go and get that medicine for everyone now?
MINA: Well... Serena, are you going to be all right here all by yourself?
SERENA: Oh, yeah. I feel a lot better.

[Mina and Rini stand up.]

MINA: Okay, let's go then, Rini.
RINI: Bye, Serena. *laughs* Let's go.

[They leave the room.]

SERENA: Amazing. They actually helped.

[At the hospital, everyone's out cold as a Nurse, Injector, stands in front of a Power Wedge. Emerald appears behind her.]

EMERALD: How is it, Injector?
INJECTOR: Well, as you can see, Emerald, Dark Power is building rapidly. It shouldn't be too much longer now.
EMERALD: Hmm.
INJECTOR: Together with this capsule and an injection of Dark Power, we should be able to open Dark Gate with ease.
EMERALD: Good, then we can get what we want and complete our mission. *laughs*

[Entering the hospital, Mina and Rini head for the pharmacy.]

MINA: It seems too quiet here.
RINI: Really?

[Rini pulls herself up onto the counter.]

RINI: Excuse me, please. We're here to pick up some medicine for...

[Rini notices nobody's at the desk.]

RINI: ...my family. Is anyone here?

[Actually, nobody is in the pharmacy.]

RINI: I don't think there's anybody here.

[Rini jumps from the counter and heads down the hall.]

RINI: Excuse me?! Hey, where is everybody?!

[Emerald, in a doctor coat, hears Rini.]

EMERALD: What?! (to Injector) I thought you said all the children were infected with the flu. She sounds perfectly fine.
INJECTOR: It's just a mistake.

[The door opens and Rini looks in.]

EMERALD: Huh?!
RINI: Can you help me? Hi, hi. Please answer me! I've come to pick up some medicine. Can you give me some?
EMERALD: Of course, my dear. I think you'd better get a flu shot yourself so you don't catch the flu that's been going around.

[Rini cringes at the needle that Emerald holds up.]

RINI: What?! A needle?!
EMERALD: Don't worry. It's not going to hurt you. Besides, it's free of charge, and you can't say no to that.
RINI: Uh, no thanks.
EMERALD: How dare you insult me by turning me down! You brat! (to Injector) Injector!

[Injector grabs Rini.]

EMERALD: Hold this kid down for me!
RINI: *screams*

[A golden moonbeam symbol appears on Rini's forehead.]

INJECTOR: What?!
EMERALD: It's Rini! I don't believe it!

[Back by the pharmacy, Mina senses danger.]

MINA: Oh, no! Rini!

[The four other scouts, still sick, also sense Rini in danger.]

GIRLS: Rini?
MINA: I'm coming after you right now. Venus Star Power!

[Mina transforms into Sailor Venus.]

EMERALD: *laughs* Fancy meeting you in a place like this. What incredible luck. (to Injector) Injector, get her.
INJECTOR: Right!

[Injector returns to her usual form. A droid whose arms are a scalpel and a hypodermic needle.]

RINI: *gasp*
INJECTOR: Ready?
SAILOR VENUS: Not so fast!
INJECTOR: *gasp*
RINI: Yay! It's Sailor Venus!
SAILOR VENUS: You terrorize innocent children and spread your evil throughout the world. You are worthless trash, and it's time to throw you out! I fight for love, and I fight for justice, too, so you'd better look out, for Sailor Venus! I shall punish you on behalf of Venus!
INJECTOR: Grr.
EMERALD: You twit! I suppose you think that you've located our Dark Power here, too, do you?
SAILOR VENUS: Of course.
RINI: Huh?
EMERALD: Why you bothersome Sailor Brats! Have you also known of our plan to spread a dangerous flu virus throughout the city from this very hospital?
SAILOR VENUS: Certainly. We've known it all along.
RINI: *gasp* (thinking) What's she talking about? She didn't know any of that. She's really smart, or she's just fooling us.
EMERALD: How could I have underestimated you and your annoying little pals? Injector, beat her down!

[Nearby, Serena slowly makes her way to the hospital accompanied by Luna and Artemis.]

LUNA: Serena, it's impossible!
ARTEMIS: You're still half in the bag. You should go back to bed.
SERENA: I think I'm okay. Rini's in danger, and I've just gotta help her.

[In other places in the city, Amy, Raye, and Lita slowly make their way to the hospital.]

SERENA: I have to save her. No matter what.

[Back in the hospital, Sailor Venus avoids Injector's attacks.]

SAILOR VENUS: Venus Crescent Beam Smash!

[Injector dodges the beam and leaps over Sailor Venus who has to duck to avoid the scalpel arm.]

SAILOR VENUS: Venus Love Chain Encircle!

[The chain wraps around the scalpel, pinning Injector to the floor.]

INJECTOR: Fire One!

[Sailor Venus jumps over the needle, but Injector is able to free herself in the process and takes aim on Sailor Venus again.]

INJECTOR: Fire Two!

[A bunch of needles pin Sailor Venus to the wall.]

SAILOR VENUS: Not good.
INJECTOR: *laugh*
EMERALD: *laugh* Game's over now, love child. Injector, stick the kid first!

[Injector faces Rini.]

INJECTOR: Fire Three!

[Rini turns and runs.]

RINI: I hate needles!

[She trips and falls to the floor. Then something zips through the air, stopping the needle.]

RINI: Huh?

[Everyone looks up to see Tuxedo Mask standing in front of Rini.]

EMERALD: *gasp*
TUXEDO MASK: A hospital is a shelter for people who are ill and need help. You abused its nurturing purposes to assist you in your evil ways instead.
SAILOR VENUS: Way to go, Tuxedo Mask!
EMERALD: Why, you! Oh, it's Mr. Nice Guy. Ugh! Injector, quit standing around! Stick it to him good!

[Injector takes aim and fires a needle at Tuxedo Mask.]

SAILOR JUPITER: Jupiter ThunderClap, Zap!

[Jupiter's attack stops the needle.]

SAILOR MERCURY: Mercury Bubbles Blast!

[Mercury's attack creates a fog thick enough to allow them to surround Emerald.]

EMERALD: What's happening?!
SAILOR MARS: You made us all sick, you slimy, wicked old troll!
SAILOR JUPITER: And now, you must accept your reward!
SAILOR VENUS: How are they able to do this?! You should still be in bed!
SAILOR MOON: We're a lot better now, Venus.
SAILOR MARS: Yeah, thanks to your efforts, pathetic as they were.
SAILOR MERCURY: We do appreciate all your efforts and good cheer.
SAILOR JUPITER: Yeah, thanks a lot, Sailor Venus.
SAILOR VENUS: Thanks, guys.
EMERALD: Now I'm ill! Injector, finish them off!

[Emerald jumps over the scouts.]

SAILOR MERCURY: Hey, let's discard this gross medical waste product. You with me, girl?
SAILOR MARS: Mars Celestial Fire, Surround!

[The attack hits Injector.]

SAILOR MERCURY: Go, Sailor Moon!

[Sailor Moon lifts up her scepter, but falls back to the floor, weak.]

SAILOR MARS: What's wrong?
SAILOR MERCURY: Sailor Moon!
SAILOR MOON: I'm sorry. I thought my fever was gone, but I guess it's still here.
SAILOR MARS: Hey, don't worry.
SAILOR MOON: Okay.
TUXEDO MASK: Cheer up, Sailor Moon!

[They all look at Tuxedo Mask, whose holding Rini.]

TUXEDO MASK: I strongly believe in you, Sailor Moon, and I have a special place for you in my heart.
SAILOR MOON: thinking) Oh, way cool (aloud) Thanks for your confidence, Tuxedo Mask.

[She stands back up and holds up her scepter.]

SAILOR MOON: Moon Scepter Activation!

[The attack hit's Injector and turns her to dust.]

SAILOR JUPITER: All right!
SAILOR MERCURY: Way to go, Sailor Moon!
SAILOR MARS: You stuck her!
SAILOR VENUS: Excuse me!
SAILOR SCOUTS: Huh?

[They turn to Sailor Venus whose still attached to the wall.]

SAILOR VENUS: I hate to break up the nice "Aren't we the best" session, but get me off of here!!
SAILOR MOON: Oops, sorry Mina. We kind of forgot. *laughs*
SAILOR VENUS: Well, some things never change. Get me down!!

[Emerald stands in another room in the hospital and watched the Power Wedge disappear.]

EMERALD: Oh, drat! I was so close to ending this! I'll avenge those lousy thorns in my side yet! Grr!

[Emerald disappears.]

[The next day at Mina's house, Mina is curled up in bed and Artemis is curled up at the foot of the bed.]

ARTEMIS: So all of the people got rid of the flu, and the city was restored to its normal hustle and bustle. Except for us poor sickies.
MINA: Oh, be quiet, Artemis., please. This is a real cold, isn't it, Artemis?
ARTEMIS: Yeah, it's gotta be.

[Luna arrives and approaches Artemis.]

LUNA: But you should feel happy. Since you caught a cold, it means you're no longer a fool, huh? Happy now?
ARTEMIS Oh, yeah. How can you be so blind? I'm sick!

[The door opens and Serena and Rini stand there complete in nurse's attire.]

SERENA: Hi! Your nurses are here!
LUNA & ARTEMIS: Huh?
SERENA: *laughs* Please try this wonderful dish especially for you!
MINA: Oh, thank you.

[Serena places a tray with a bowl of soup on it in front of Mina. Mina takes a spoonful and tries it. the reaction is instant.]

SERENA: Well, what do you think? Isn't it too delish?
MINA: Uh, yeah.

[Reluctantly, Mina swallows another spoonful.]

MINA: Mmm. Mmmm.
SERENA: Ho hoo! Great! She likes it! I'm so good!

[Rini appears next to Serena, holding the thermometer.]

RINI: Time to test your temperature now!

[Serena snatches the thermometer from Rini.]

SERENA: Not now, Rini. She's eating, and it's my great food.
RINI: I'm helping!
SERENA: Not now!
RINI: Why, you're just a big bully!
SERENA: What are you trying to do?!

[A fight breaks out between Serena and Rini on the floor.]

MINA: I guess the old saying's true. 'What goes around comes around.'
ARTEMIS: *sigh*
MINA: Please, just leave me alone!!